Hey, it’s okay, you’re anxious because the moment the world is anxiety-inducing.
The feeling in the world right now reminds me of when Melbourne was deep in lockdown for 111 days. It was an everyday fear of the numbers of infected, the deaths, the anger at the rules, the outrage online and in the streets.
It was exhausting to try and get through, trying to keep your own spirits up, or fake it for those who were struggling worse than you. It was simply a terrible time, with so much ‘outrage’.
Now we have fear of the outcome of an election in the USA that could allow people to be more horrendous than they already are. We have weekly rallies in the cities to stop a terrible and tragic situation in Palestine. Hostages still being held. Wars in small faraway countries that supposedly no one cares about because we can’t see ourselves in people affected by them. Anger online for how people are advocating, or not advocating, nothing we do is enough for others. Plus a cost of living crisis and a total lack of support from the governments around us. I get it’s hard. I know.
But outrage is an addiction for so many. From an evolutionary standpoint, humans have sought to get and preserve their so-called belief in their own “high social status’ within their close-knit communities. Publicly condemning the actions of others might serve, in part, to boost the social standing of the individual voicing the condemnation. This is probably why people get the gratifying sensation frequently associated with expressing outrage. Basically, you’re being a self-important twat.
Years ago I did a contract for a consulting firm that specialised in social licencing for big ugly corporates. Its mission was to get people to accept the inevitable. The mines, the wind farms, the car park instead of the nature reserve, and the rail line through the indigenous burial grounds. That sort of heartwarming work. I tell you now, the people rarely win. It is hard to stop “progress” as Bill Hesslop claimed.
One of the senior consultants talked about how the average person with little to no agency in their own life, loves outrage. It gives them an outlet. If they’re not heard at home, work, or in everyday life, they are easy to outrage. Sometimes the consultants would redirect the outrage through well-placed media or issues that would then get the outragers up in arms, meanwhile, the law has been passed, the train has gone through the spirit ground, and the canary has sung in the mine. (I didn’t last long there, it was hard to sleep at night.)
Over the weekend, I retired an online group of a few thousand people after some OUTRAGE. I don’t have the mental resilience to manage this level of bullshit anymore. I am tired, I have shit happening in my life, I have to keep things tight, and as a friend said after I spoke to her about it - ‘Everything has an expiry date.’ I keep hearing the term, deliberate misunderstanding in my head and it makes me realise, I had to let it go, because the world is becoming angrier and it is coming for us all if we don’t self-protect.
The next day I saw some pretty awful bullying and pile-on behaviour in another Facebook group, it was brutal to watch. I left the group and then went through my social media and left all the groups that bought nothing but outrage and nasty shit to my feeds.
Then I deleted Threads, which is fast becoming another cesspit like Twitter is. Also, I have decided, no one needs my opinions on anything. I am not educated enough to offer anything about anything important. The world doesn’t need my 2 cents, also as a certified Yapper, I sometimes suffer from Yapper Regret so the best way is to not have the chance to Yap anymore than I already do.
I hear people wondering why everyone is so angry. Perhaps the words below can shine a light on it.
THE ECHO CHAMBER EFFECT
Social media algorithms are designed to show us content that aligns with our existing beliefs and interests, inadvertently creating echo chambers. These digital bubbles reinforce our views and can intensify our reactions to opposing opinions, fueling the fire of social media outrage, cancel culture, and online shaming. The echo chamber effect not only narrows our exposure to diverse perspectives but also makes any dissenting opinion seem more alien and, therefore, more provoking.
Social media is absolutely to blame for the nutso outrage we see at the moment. We have to be so careful about what we watch and listen to.
But I’m not a social media renunciate. I love Tiktok, because I can watch what I like. Last night I watched a five-part series of a beautiful horse in Iceland giving birth and how they managed to get this huge colt out and how they then tied a full water bottle to the umbilical cord to help her deliver the “burden” (the name the Icelandic horse breeder called the placenta).
Tonight it showed me how to make a perfect gravy for my roast lamb.
It’s also teaching me to edit the negative out of my life as much as I can. People, news, drama, disappointment.
My therapist said that people who are addicted to always seeing the negative in anything can often have depression and anxiety. I think everyone has some negative bias but lately, I see so much of it that I have closed the door to my little cave. I have to hope and believe that the world is still kind and there can be peace and balance in our beliefs. I understand that positivity can also be toxic by not acknowledging how difficult things are for people at that moment, but something in between works for me. And also, when we see good stuff, we have to recognise it and remember it for when it happens again.
I will let Ottessa Moshfegh finish this up for me. It is my endless goal and one, that some days I make come true. I am thankful to be here.
“Here is how I spend my days now. I live in a beautiful place. I sleep in a beautiful bed. I eat beautiful food. I go for walks through beautiful places. I care for people deeply. At night my bed is full of love, because I alone am in it. I cry easily, from pain and pleasure, and I don’t apologize for that. In the mornings I step outside and I’m thankful for another day. It took me many years to arrive at such a life.”
― Ottessa Moshfegh, EileenKate
xx
Thank you for running the group for so long, I have loved being part of it. :)